{"id":427,"date":"2010-11-09T05:30:15","date_gmt":"2010-11-09T05:30:15","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.vappingo.com\/word-blog\/?p=427"},"modified":"2026-03-18T17:27:55","modified_gmt":"2026-03-18T17:27:55","slug":"humorous-english-proofreading-rules","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.vappingo.com\/word-blog\/humorous-english-proofreading-rules\/","title":{"rendered":"32 Extremely Funny English Proofreading Rules"},"content":{"rendered":"

We found several different versions of these proofreading rules<\/strong> on the Internet and decided to combine them and add a few of our own.<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. Don’t be redundant; don’t use more words than necessary; it’s highly superfluous and completely and utterly over the top.<\/li>\n
  2. Be more or less specific. At the end of the day it’s better to get straight to the point than to beat around the bush.<\/li>\n
  3. Understatement is the best possible method of achieving amazing results.<\/li>\n
  4. Exaggeration is one hundred, billion times worse than understatement.<\/li>\n
  5. One-word sentences? Eliminate. Immediately. Always.<\/li>\n
  6. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake, as useful as a chocolate fireguard.<\/li>\n
  7. The passive voice is to be avoided.<\/li>\n
  8. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.<\/li>\n
  9. Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.<\/li>\n
  10. Oxymoron examples<\/a> cause organized chaos.<\/li>\n
  11. Who needs rhetorical questions?<\/li>\n
  12. Avoid alliteration. Always.<\/li>\n
  13. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.<\/li>\n
  14. Avoid clich\u00e9s like the plague; they’re old hat.<\/li>\n
  15. Employ the vernacular.<\/li>\n
  16. Eschew ampersands, abbreviations and acronyms, etc. E.g. They are OTT and make no sense.<\/li>\n
  17. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are unnecessary (and avoidable).<\/li>\n
  18. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.<\/li>\n
  19. Contractions aren’t necessary. \u00a0They’re a waste of time.<\/li>\n
  20. Foreign words and phrases are not apropos, comprehendes?<\/li>\n
  21. One shouldn’t generalize.<\/li>\n
  22. Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson once said: “I hate quotations. Tell me what you know.”<\/li>\n
  23. Comparisons are as bad as cliches.<\/li>\n
  24. Correct speling is essentail.<\/li>\n
  25. Never use no double negatives.<\/li>\n
  26. No to sentence fragments.<\/li>\n
  27. It’s important that verbs is in agreement with their subjects.<\/li>\n
  28. Only use apostophe’s when they are needed.<\/li>\n
  29. Be specific, in a round-about way.<\/li>\n
  30. And never start sentences with a conjunction.<\/li>\n
  31. Always cheque you’re homonym use.<\/li>\n
  32. Don’t overuse exclamations!!!!!<\/li>\n
  33. Always proofread your final work. Don’t any words out.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    Have you any ideas for more humorous proofreading rules? \u00a0Give us a shout and we’ll add them to our list.<\/p>\n

    If you’re looking for a little help with your written English, check out our online proofreading services<\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    We found several different versions of these proofreading rules on the Internet and decided to combine them and add a few of our own.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2693,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[10],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-427","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-editing"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vappingo.com\/word-blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/427","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vappingo.com\/word-blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vappingo.com\/word-blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vappingo.com\/word-blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vappingo.com\/word-blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=427"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.vappingo.com\/word-blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/427\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":9828,"href":"https:\/\/www.vappingo.com\/word-blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/427\/revisions\/9828"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vappingo.com\/word-blog\/wp-json\/"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vappingo.com\/word-blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=427"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vappingo.com\/word-blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=427"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vappingo.com\/word-blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=427"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}